i've been practicing yoga for nearly 5 years. it's been great - excellent for a pinched nerve i was having trouble with and very calming which was the point of my starting in the first place. and, since it's an exercise based on breathing, what better workout could there be for a perfumer?

i usually go to a studio a few blocks from the gallery and over the years i've found a few teachers there whose classes i really enjoy. unfortunately since the gallery opened to the public, my schedule is a bit tighter and i can't take the time in the afternoon as i used to but i still make a point of standing on my head at least twice a week.

for me, yoga has been an interesting experience. back in the day when i was younger, i used to do regular physical exercise of some sort - either going to the gym, taking ballet barre classes and there was a brief flirtation with tai chi that unfortunately came to an end when i moved from new york.

but then i started my first company and suddenly there weren't enough hours in the day. people often assume that running a perfumery is "glamorous" but anyone who has a business of their own can tell you it's a lot of hard work. so exercise got shoved aside for many years which wasn't a good thing.

shortly after i moved to brooklyn, i found the yoga studio nearby and began my practice. i decided it was definitely time to take better care of myself - especially since i am determined to age as gracefully as possible.

one of the things i like best about doing yoga is that if you keep at it things that were impossible at first suddenly become effortless with time. and while there are still a number of things i still have a lot of trouble with, i am still surprised when suddenly i can twist myself into new shapes. so that's all been very good and very enjoyable.

this past monday evening however, for the first time doing yoga, i ran into a serious problem. i'd arrived at the studio and was sitting in the waiting area until the previous class finished and i could roll out my mat. other students were arriving and while they were signing in and unpacking, i read a book.

suddenly i became aware that an appalling perfume had come in. there were about a dozen people in the room but i was able to almost instantly track this olfactory atrocity to a rather "fashionable" shall we say? young lady who had come in a few minutes before. my reaction to this fragrance started with a sense of general unease in the nose and rapidly turned into a bad headache & nausea. within a few minutes i was sick as a dog and realized there was no way i'd be able to make it through class.

frankly this made me very angry. i'd been in such a good mood all day and was really looking forward to an hour of yoga in the evening. now there was absolutely no way since i was about to throw up (and very nearly did several times on my walk home - this wasn't pretty).

i couldn't quite figure out exactly what to do however. should i tell this girl she was committing olfactory offense? i didn't think there was really any point in humiliating her in front of the other students. and i also realized based on the prime aromachemical in her perfume that i knew was making me nauseous, that she may well not realize the effect of her perfume on others because she couldn't smell it herself.

this particular chemical has a very curious property - half the people on the planet are anosmic to it. they cannot smell it at ALL. a few with time & repeated exposure can develop the capacity to detect it but for most it's completely unnoticeable. but for an unfortunate few like me, it's the olfactory equivalent to someone playing the trumpet very loudly and very badly right next to one while locked in an overheated closet.

i've learned that i can tolerate this stuff in fractional quantities or if blended correctly with certain other materials. above a certain level though, my eyes water, my throat closes up, my head aches like a migraine and i have a very hard time keeping down my lunch.

very very sadly however, this aromachemical is one of the most common on earth. it's in virtually every synthetic "musk" manufactured (which is why i cannot bear them) and in a huge number of commercially manufactured fragrances. i have it on excellent authority that most of the perfumes i loathe the most contain upwards of 40% of this noxious stuff and certain others that begin well but dry down to a sickly cloying "musk" have a least a little in there. it also figures prominently in many "unscented" body products where it's used as a "masking agent" to "hide the chemical scent of the product itself". i have even been given to understand it also makes it's way into certain flavorings as well because it "boosts" the character of other flavors - it makes the mint in toothpaste seem mintier. this is a frightening concept. essentially it's impossible to get away from this stuff and i find that outrageous.

the overwhelming prevalence of this chemical, galaxolide, is one of the Prime Reasons that I Hate Perfume.

i'm afraid i am going to have to get out my soapbox again. i hadn't planned to but now i'm annoyed. possibly it's the weather - which has been quite humid here the past few days and that causes odors to seem a good deal more pungent - but i am tired of being unexpected assaulted and rendered sick to my stomach by atrocious fragrances. the natural smells of new york are quite enough to contend with on the average day without adding the artificial.

i do not want to have my yoga class ruined because i am suddenly made sick.

i do not want to walk down the street & suddenly gag and be unable to breathe because someone is burning crap incense or wearing a perfume detectable a block away.

i do not want to smell people BEFORE they actually arrive.

i do not want to get into an elevator and be unable to press the floor button because my eyes are watering due to a miasma of "perfume".

i do not want to lose my appetite in a restaurant because someone has just walked in wearing the latest fashionable fragrance disaster.

i do not want to get motion sickness on buses or subways because i am crammed up against someone wearing something horrible either.

and i am not alone.

and kindly don't bother to sit at your computers sending me bitchy whiny emails about how no one has the right to tell people what scents they can and cannot wear and i should stop bitching & whining myself. i don't wanna hear it. in theory i agree but i'll say flat out that your right to wear an obnoxious fragrance ends where it hits my nose.

kindly keep in mind that I HATE PERFUME. if you have any questions on that point please refer to my manifesto which i wrote BEFORE i began making it in the first place and is just as valid for me right this minute as it was when i wrote it in 1992. this document pretty much lays out very clearly what is acceptable and what is not when it comes to perfume.

(just so you know those two previous paragraphs were not addressed to the countless people who know, understand & respect my work but to that tribe who clearly have no clue what i'm about but seem to have nothing better to do with their time than jump to conclusions & send me cranky-grams via email. naturally those people have the right to their opinions just like everyone else and they're welcome to keep them to themselves.)

back in 2000 there was a bit of an uproar in the fragrance world when the city of halifax in nova scotia banned the public use of ALL fragrance. i was interviewed several times to get my point of view on this curious social phenomenon. i still think this was wrong and much too extreme - and until that law is removed from the books i have no wish to set foot in halifax. people certainly have the right to wear fragrance and should.

BUT i do wish people would learn to wear it responsibly and more to the point i wish those who manufacture it would take into consideration just a bit more than the "end consumer" - like those of us who have to deal with the perfumes they unleash on the world.

perfume is a beautiful magical thing - at least it can & should be.

well i think i've worn myself out for the present. yelling even in print is so exhausting. i was trying to think of a slightly more positive way to end this entry (which became a good deal longer & grouchier than i'd intended) but i can't off the top of my head so the hell with it.

i think instead, i'm going to get out my copy of huysman's "au rebours" and read that...

well the holidays are over thank god. actually i had a very nice time this year but i'm still a little on the worn out side. december is a FIERCE month. also i'm very behind (i'd meant to make a New Year's entry here and i now realize it's the 4th so much for that) and my one main new year's resolution this year has already gone to hell.

i made the decision to stop smoking along with 2 friends of mine - we all quit together on new year's eve. tuesday was fine (possibly because i was largely unconscious the whole day) but unfortunately by the middle of wednesday afternoon i was ready to bite pencils in half and i broke down and had a cig. this was not good and i'm not at all happy about it. however, i will be climbing back on the wagon, gritting my teeth and i WILL quit if it kills me which i know full well it won't and that it may well do if i don't. i've got two days off this weekend and i plan to lock myself inside away from the general public to get over the worst of the process.

it will all be fine.

this morning i got a really wonderful email from a woman who'd just gotten a bottle of my "at the beach 1966". she was so kind in what she said. here's my reply to her:

dear jennifer,

thank you very much for your kind words. very much appreciated! and i'm extremely pleased you get the point of "at the beach 1966".

i found your comments about the "arrogant perfume reporter" very amusing. everyone's a critic these days which is both funny and annoying. i'm still surprised that so many people have lost the capacity to enjoy the marvelous simple things that life is so full of while continuing to point out the flaws in everything around them. i'm sure she would prefer the south of france and i'd also be willing to bet it's because she's never been there and probably never will.

i have to say that i've only been to the sea in the south of france once a long time ago when i was 18 and while it was a perfectly pleasant day, it can't live in my memory so powerfully as that day when i was four on the beach in delaware...

the cote d'azur is all well and good but we need to remember new jersey has its place too.

glad you found it.

best wishes,

cb

her message made me think a bit. maybe it's the weather (which is bitter cold with a wind that rips the skin right off the face) maybe it's that sense of ennui caused by much less nicotine in my system or maybe it's my annual early january depression but i suddenly decided the beach is exactly where i'd like to be right now. who wouldn't?

so i decided to knock $5 off the price of "at the beach 1966" until the middle of february when things begin to seem less bleak. also at that time my business manager informs me that a slight price increase is going to be necessary which i'm not thrilled about but c'est la vie. sadly it's not the least expensive thing in the world to make perfume as i do and certain materials have jumped alarmingly in price this past year. and since i refuse to cut quality certain adjustments will have to be made.

but in the meantime, i still want everyone to have a better opportunity to get to the beach even if like me they can't leave home. a little sand, warm sun on the face, the cool breeze from the ocean - trust me there isn't a day goes by that i don't realize how lucky i am to be able to put all that in one tiny bottle...

enjoy!

"Most of the principal characters in this book by now being thoroughly uncomfortable in their various ways, Christmas did its best to bring on the culminating point of horror."

Angela Thirkell - Marling Hall

i do love angela thirkell and have read nearly all her books - at least all of her barsetshire novels; there are one or two seemingly obscure others that i haven't yet been able to track down.

i remember laughing out loud when i first read the above quote from "marling hall". having spent so much of my life in retail related trades which are ALL ABOUT the intense pressures of the holiday season, i could totally relate. i'd become used to being so cranky by the time the 24th of december rolled around that i could barely be civil when someone wished me a happy holiday. "fuck you / drop dead" was pretty much the sentiment that occupied my thought bubble although i kept a (probably somewhat insane looking) cheerful smile on my face.

generally by the time christmas actually arrived i was so worn out that while others were happily unwrapping presents and toasting with eggnog i was passed out beside the tree snoring away. i'd come to in time for valentine's day and sometime around easter i'd start to feel myself again and could be safely unleashed in public without anyone running the risk of being bitten.

this year has been very different. despite the fact that i haven't had a proper day off since early november and the past few weeks have been a circus, i've managed to maintain a much more positive outlook on the whole holiday affair. amazing what changing one's point of view can accomplish.

and while i still haven't reached the ebeneezer scrooge after the third ghost stage, i am determined to enjoy this holiday. in fact i'm actually looking forward to it. i plan to have a few friends over for dinner (which will certainly be catered as there's absolutely no way i'd ever subject anyone to a dinner prepared by me) and i expect we'll play a few board games, drink a fair amount of eggnog or whiskey and maybe play a few games. i think it will be nice. at least that's the plan.

since there are still 7 days until christmas, we'll see how it goes...

Sometimes I think it is only by amusing others that I escape for a moment from the smell of everything.

Norman Mailer - Ancient Evenings

last week i finished "mrs peel", my cocktail perfume. i figured out what i wanted to do with the base & arrived at a correct concentration. the scent smells good - just like the drink - but i've decided i'm going to release the perfume sometime late next spring. it's so brisk & refreshing i think it will be much nicer to wear in the summer...