i've been practicing yoga for nearly 5 years. it's been great - excellent for a pinched nerve i was having trouble with and very calming which was the point of my starting in the first place. and, since it's an exercise based on breathing, what better workout could there be for a perfumer?

i usually go to a studio a few blocks from the gallery and over the years i've found a few teachers there whose classes i really enjoy. unfortunately since the gallery opened to the public, my schedule is a bit tighter and i can't take the time in the afternoon as i used to but i still make a point of standing on my head at least twice a week.

for me, yoga has been an interesting experience. back in the day when i was younger, i used to do regular physical exercise of some sort - either going to the gym, taking ballet barre classes and there was a brief flirtation with tai chi that unfortunately came to an end when i moved from new york.

but then i started my first company and suddenly there weren't enough hours in the day. people often assume that running a perfumery is "glamorous" but anyone who has a business of their own can tell you it's a lot of hard work. so exercise got shoved aside for many years which wasn't a good thing.

shortly after i moved to brooklyn, i found the yoga studio nearby and began my practice. i decided it was definitely time to take better care of myself - especially since i am determined to age as gracefully as possible.

one of the things i like best about doing yoga is that if you keep at it things that were impossible at first suddenly become effortless with time. and while there are still a number of things i still have a lot of trouble with, i am still surprised when suddenly i can twist myself into new shapes. so that's all been very good and very enjoyable.

this past monday evening however, for the first time doing yoga, i ran into a serious problem. i'd arrived at the studio and was sitting in the waiting area until the previous class finished and i could roll out my mat. other students were arriving and while they were signing in and unpacking, i read a book.

suddenly i became aware that an appalling perfume had come in. there were about a dozen people in the room but i was able to almost instantly track this olfactory atrocity to a rather "fashionable" shall we say? young lady who had come in a few minutes before. my reaction to this fragrance started with a sense of general unease in the nose and rapidly turned into a bad headache & nausea. within a few minutes i was sick as a dog and realized there was no way i'd be able to make it through class.

frankly this made me very angry. i'd been in such a good mood all day and was really looking forward to an hour of yoga in the evening. now there was absolutely no way since i was about to throw up (and very nearly did several times on my walk home - this wasn't pretty).

i couldn't quite figure out exactly what to do however. should i tell this girl she was committing olfactory offense? i didn't think there was really any point in humiliating her in front of the other students. and i also realized based on the prime aromachemical in her perfume that i knew was making me nauseous, that she may well not realize the effect of her perfume on others because she couldn't smell it herself.

this particular chemical has a very curious property - half the people on the planet are anosmic to it. they cannot smell it at ALL. a few with time & repeated exposure can develop the capacity to detect it but for most it's completely unnoticeable. but for an unfortunate few like me, it's the olfactory equivalent to someone playing the trumpet very loudly and very badly right next to one while locked in an overheated closet.

i've learned that i can tolerate this stuff in fractional quantities or if blended correctly with certain other materials. above a certain level though, my eyes water, my throat closes up, my head aches like a migraine and i have a very hard time keeping down my lunch.

very very sadly however, this aromachemical is one of the most common on earth. it's in virtually every synthetic "musk" manufactured (which is why i cannot bear them) and in a huge number of commercially manufactured fragrances. i have it on excellent authority that most of the perfumes i loathe the most contain upwards of 40% of this noxious stuff and certain others that begin well but dry down to a sickly cloying "musk" have a least a little in there. it also figures prominently in many "unscented" body products where it's used as a "masking agent" to "hide the chemical scent of the product itself". i have even been given to understand it also makes it's way into certain flavorings as well because it "boosts" the character of other flavors - it makes the mint in toothpaste seem mintier. this is a frightening concept. essentially it's impossible to get away from this stuff and i find that outrageous.

the overwhelming prevalence of this chemical, galaxolide, is one of the Prime Reasons that I Hate Perfume.

i'm afraid i am going to have to get out my soapbox again. i hadn't planned to but now i'm annoyed. possibly it's the weather - which has been quite humid here the past few days and that causes odors to seem a good deal more pungent - but i am tired of being unexpected assaulted and rendered sick to my stomach by atrocious fragrances. the natural smells of new york are quite enough to contend with on the average day without adding the artificial.

i do not want to have my yoga class ruined because i am suddenly made sick.

i do not want to walk down the street & suddenly gag and be unable to breathe because someone is burning crap incense or wearing a perfume detectable a block away.

i do not want to smell people BEFORE they actually arrive.

i do not want to get into an elevator and be unable to press the floor button because my eyes are watering due to a miasma of "perfume".

i do not want to lose my appetite in a restaurant because someone has just walked in wearing the latest fashionable fragrance disaster.

i do not want to get motion sickness on buses or subways because i am crammed up against someone wearing something horrible either.

and i am not alone.

and kindly don't bother to sit at your computers sending me bitchy whiny emails about how no one has the right to tell people what scents they can and cannot wear and i should stop bitching & whining myself. i don't wanna hear it. in theory i agree but i'll say flat out that your right to wear an obnoxious fragrance ends where it hits my nose.

kindly keep in mind that I HATE PERFUME. if you have any questions on that point please refer to my manifesto which i wrote BEFORE i began making it in the first place and is just as valid for me right this minute as it was when i wrote it in 1992. this document pretty much lays out very clearly what is acceptable and what is not when it comes to perfume.

(just so you know those two previous paragraphs were not addressed to the countless people who know, understand & respect my work but to that tribe who clearly have no clue what i'm about but seem to have nothing better to do with their time than jump to conclusions & send me cranky-grams via email. naturally those people have the right to their opinions just like everyone else and they're welcome to keep them to themselves.)

back in 2000 there was a bit of an uproar in the fragrance world when the city of halifax in nova scotia banned the public use of ALL fragrance. i was interviewed several times to get my point of view on this curious social phenomenon. i still think this was wrong and much too extreme - and until that law is removed from the books i have no wish to set foot in halifax. people certainly have the right to wear fragrance and should.

BUT i do wish people would learn to wear it responsibly and more to the point i wish those who manufacture it would take into consideration just a bit more than the "end consumer" - like those of us who have to deal with the perfumes they unleash on the world.

perfume is a beautiful magical thing - at least it can & should be.

well i think i've worn myself out for the present. yelling even in print is so exhausting. i was trying to think of a slightly more positive way to end this entry (which became a good deal longer & grouchier than i'd intended) but i can't off the top of my head so the hell with it.

i think instead, i'm going to get out my copy of huysman's "au rebours" and read that...